ADVENTURE BY JATHA PEDA

A new country, a new culture, exotic foods and smells, and different customs – how exciting!

At the end of 2019, we left South Africa, filled with the hope of a brighter future and the promise of thrilling new experiences in a foreign land.

We left behind a country that seemed to be falling apart, a place that, in our eyes, had no future.

As the airplane’s wheels lifted off the tarmac, a wave of relief washed over me. As the provider, the mother, the one who is supposed to keep everything together, I had found a way out of our struggles. No more worries about food, electricity, or teaching – or so I thought.

A new beginning awaited us.

But then, the battle in my mind began.

Reality is never quite what you imagine it to be.

Many challenges awaited us: a new climate, hot and humid; a new job, where I learned the meaning of KPIs through lesson observations; and a whole slew of responsibilities: finding a house, getting a car, acquiring an identity card, training, opening a bank account, buying furniture, purchasing cutlery and crockery, enrolling my children in school, buying them new school clothes, finding a garbage collector, learning the customs, and understanding the do’s and don’ts. Not to mention negotiating endless bureaucratic red tape.

And through it all, I had to smile.

I couldn’t let my kids see my stress. It had to look easy.

Then Covid hit, and the stress levels reached new heights. What if we get Covid? What if my elderly parents in South Africa get Covid? What if I die from Covid and my kids are left behind in a strange country? The ‘what-ifs’ kept piling up.

Every day was a struggle just to stay afloat.

The battle in my mind continued: how would we survive? I couldn’t leave now – we’d sold everything in South Africa. Months of preparation had gone into this move. We had nothing to go back to. There was no way out. We had to stay and make it work.

I started to look for the positives:

• It’s safe here.

• I have an amazing job with great pay.

• My kids are in an excellent school.

• We have a big, furnished house.

• No load shedding. No water shortages.

• I’m saving money every month.

But…

We were surviving, not living. Just going through the motions. Months turned into years.

We became settled in a very lonely, unhappy comfort zone. 

We were constantly searching for a spark of happiness: a spectacular sunset, the antics of Millie, our adorable cat, special coffee dates with friends, or trips to other foreign countries.

And we kept asking ourselves the same question over and over: 

Is it worth it? Is it really worth it? 

We were just wishing for time to pass, living from one South African holiday to the next. Money and comfort were stealing our peace and happiness.

As time went on, the longing for family, friends, familiar smells, foods, cool climates, and winters became more intense. It wasn’t getting better, as everyone had promised. I longed to have a simple conversation with anyone – the cashier, the person pumping gas, the waiter at the coffee shop. I missed the warmth of South African friendliness. The ‘falling apart country’ began to look like an oasis in a long desert journey.

It took five years of internal battles, longing, conversations, wishes, and dreams before we made the most important decision of our lives.

We realized that we could be happy with only bread in the cupboard. We could be content in a small space surrounded by family and friends. We didn’t need a large bank account. We didn’t need extravagant vacations, the latest phone, designer clothes, or the best car. 

What we needed was love. We needed to belong. We needed the familiar. These are the core needs. Without them, nothing else feels worth it.

We left our comfort zone, and now, three months later, we are all still thankful. Our lives overflow with gratitude. Every experience is savoured, and even the smallest moments leave us in awe.

We are grateful for everything we’ve experienced far from home. It’s shaped our characters and made us realize: money doesn’t buy happiness.

There truly is no place like home.