The Things We Love

... (and Need) 

The whirring of the hairdryer had me floating.
Slack jaw. Eyes back. Mouth-breathing like a woman freshly lobotomized by hair spray and the incessant chattering of the women in the hair salon.
I caught myself in the mirror and grinned, my dissociative bliss face fully activated.
Lawd. Menopause has made me a bit of a hedonist.
And honestly? I’m enjoying the little indulgences.

Let’s talk about the things we unapologetically love.

Not because we’re trying to stay “relevant.”

But because these things are deeply, deliciously ours.

1. Beauty Rituals
    (Sanity not Vanity)

A silky pillowcase. A castor oil mask. That perfume that lingers...slightly intoxicating and very much your signature. Or the smell of you, musky, primal and life-affirming! Either way, we're enjoy our bodies and we're in awe at the miracle of it. 
So we pamper:
We do it for us. 
For that moment we catch our reflection in the mirror and think:
“Damn, I look like I slept.”
Add a waffle robe, slippers, and a hot honey ginger tea to the mix and… hello, nirvana.

2. Connection + Conversation

It’s not just talk, it’s connection.
Connection to other women, now and in our shared past.

Through conversations we’re decoding the week, unloading emotions, and unraveling existential spirals in single voice notes. 

And through connection to our ancestral mothers, particularly those who were enslaved, or on the margins of society, we come to understand.

How powerful didn't they need to be? They may not have written books or essays, or journalled, but would have communed in ways we have long forgotten. communing with self, with nature, with the sacred? And weaving their wisdom into the tapestry that became our lives.

On the daily we are insync with the women who are important to us: 

You know when your bestie’s off. 
No explanation needed.
One “You good?” text and suddenly it’s deep convo's via WhatsApp.

There’s no such thing as small talk.
We do soul talk.

3. Health + Wellness   (Yes, with Cake)

Yoga. Walks. Yelling at the news while on the treadmill.
But don’t confuse that for self-optimisation, for trying to be our best selves...puh!

It’s not about being smaller, tighter, younger.
It’s about feeling strong enough to keep chipping away at challenges and holding our worlds in secure, loving hands.

They need to feel safe and cared for.

So we stretch. We sweat. We hydrate. We 'meditate'.

Then we eat the cake.
And the crisps.
And that chocolate at bedtime.

4. Creative Expression

We are born to create, it's in our DNA. 
So we create journals, playlists, flower arrangements, doodles, erotic fiction in blogger apps ... it’s not always “productive,” but it’s always from a sacred space.

We do it for different reasons, depends on the mood or the feeling.
It's a switch off
A feeling of letting the feels in the background surface and the echoes stop.
It's a grounding and finding balance... and the colours , flowers, beads or words used are a reflection of that moment.

And if your bestie doesn’t reply “OMG OBSESSED” to your latest blog post, or creation, send out a search party. Your girl is MIA.

5. Solo Time + Sweet Escape

We love our people. But oh, we need to be without them sometimes, without the guilt.
Solo coffee. Solo errands.
Solo bathroom sesh: candle light, door locked, “DO NOT DISTURB” sign taped up like a warning label.
Solitude isn’t selfish. It’s soul maintenance.

Even a quick escape to the supermarket, yoga beats in your ears, counts.
Better yet, Sundays after yoga, coffee or matcha fix plus a pastry or spicy butternut bao, depending on your mood.

After a full week of mama-ing, that solo escape makes for a better mama.
Give us silence, stretchy pants, and Chill Yoga beats.
We’ll come back rebooted and ready for the 3 faces waiting in the window and waving.

6. Sun Rituals + Good Vibes (Made, Not Found)

We don’t wait for good vibes, we create them.
Some mornings, the sun is blazing at 45 degrees and the only safe “soak” is from the living room floor. Doesn’t matter. We make it happen.
A sun ritual isn’t about the sun.
It’s about showing up.
The stretch. The deep breath. The shake. The tap.
That moment your feet hit the ground and your soul says:
“Let’s go.”
It’s your private morning ceremony - equal parts grounding and glorious.
And when life feels like chaos?
That ritual becomes your anchor.

And Finally…

We’re not high-maintenance.
We have high standards, after all, we create the canvas against which lives play out.

So , we indulge in the things:

The fresh set of bangs or the short haircut we'll instantly regret, our favourite cafe sipping a coffee...slowly. Or we find a sun spot on the window seat of the 12th floor  hotel room and bake, or we burn a candle that reminds us of home sitting silently in a foreign land that is not quite home.

These aren’t indulgences.
They’re survival.
They’re tiny treats.
They’re how we centre ourselves again, and again, and again.
Because we too need nurturing, and we are the best nurturers.

Step aside. Mama’s rested, radiant, and ready to take charge.

Thanks to these women, for the conversation, the connection, 

& the sharing, Zainab, Aishah, Zo, Raya & Fadela, 

wIth love always,

Nariman